Installment 1(ii) b

PM Trumble announced a ‘belt and road’ style Pacific initiative in partnership with Japan and USA. “We are going to build bridges between the Pacific Islands and Australia”, Trumble explained, “using Australian steel, workers and banks in consort with anyone but China.  We’re a tad concerned about undersea footings, but where there’s a tax holiday there’s a way”.  The initiative will be known as ‘Alt Debt and Deficit Lite’.

Lord Spatchcock Frowner thanked ex PM Bon Lowbrow for his efforts to drag the hot aggots of the Mayo campaign out of the fire.  “It was a lost cause’, whined Frowner, double dipping his chip, “in the face of a lumpen spread from Adelaide we couldn’t stop the rot”.

East Timor has warned Foreign Minister Mashup to drop the indictments against spying whistle blowers in Canberra, or face the prospect of her Government’s espionage efforts finding their way into the next Mission Impossible movie.  

Government spokespersons are out in force again today spruiking big end tax cuts, explaining recent electoral set backs as part of the normal weather cycle.  “You know where you stand with us”, emphasized a Liberal backbencher, “if you’re rich enough to avoid tax, you need more incentives and indentured labour pools”.

Breaking World News (summary):

A further CAPS LOCK TWEET from the Grabber-in-Chief threatening total annihilation of America’s enemies has had little effect. President Ruemenot organized his whole country to flip the Grabber the bird at 3pm (GMT minus 4.5 hrs).

The White House has denied the Grabber’s order for Special Counsel Prober to cease and desist was anything more than an ‘opinion’. Firing squads have been told to stand down until further announcements.

Philippines President Roberto Muerte has organized a mass crushing of luxury cars by bulldozer, whilst their owners are still inside.  “That’ll teach them to flaunt their wealth”, Muerte told an adoring crowd, “especially since I never got my cut”.